if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize