The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
