Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Congratulations! We have a period
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