we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
