its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Randomize
