I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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