You're my little dorito
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
