You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
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