I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize
