I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
