i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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