how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
