I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
