spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize