After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
