He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
