I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize