i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
