I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
