i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
