Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
