apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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