Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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