I feel like I'm in dance class right now
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Randomize
