So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
