dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
