she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
