so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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