I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize