K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
