I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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