Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize