How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
