My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
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