Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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