frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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