Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I'm too high and old for this...
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
