yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
