I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Randomize
