Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
i think i have herpe
just one?
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
