After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
