You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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