the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
