Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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