i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Randomize
