Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
MIDGETS
????
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize
