and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
