Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
