That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
he puts the penis in happiness.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
