I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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