I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
